A Journey of Survival
Your aricle “If you don’t want to live anymore. .”, Made me feel a lot better than i was before i read it. I feel so alone but feel more fotunate than others in some ways so I feel weak for having such abandonment issues. It’s been very hard the past half a year from being homeless, living in a car for 3 months with my gf. I messed up a lot and even a chance to be working for a company I wanted to work at as a glass blower because of everything in my head. I feel no support from my gf even tho I understand I need to push harder in life but honestly my motivation is not there at all. We argue a lot and she says things to kill my confifdenfe and make me feel way low. It’s gotten to the point where I want to leave her real bad but I do love her alot. It’s annoying to try to make someone see something but when she’s angry she becomes very mean and doesn’t care what anyone says specially when she’s in the wrong, she becomes very immature but maybe I’m the dumb immature one for dealing with all this. She’s 22 and I’m 27, i understand the age gap but there are things we do connect specially sexually (sry if it’s too much info ). I just don’t want to focus on myself but what’s around me. My anxieties are bad and people fail to understand that, it’s like anxiety is a joke for people cause they don’t understand it..I just want to feel connected to something.
Hey.. thank you. Not sure what else to say.. I’m at the end of my rope.. shoot I just at the least sprained my hand punching a wall earlier from being so mad at myself for almost giving in to that void that ever calls me closer to it’s sweet Melody… It’s hard… And I wouldn’t be here if not for you. I’ve googled “I want to die” and read your post on numerous occasions… So on behalf of my mom and dad as well as my dog and seven cats.. thank you. -Manic
PS.. if you see this and have time I have left my email for you.. I’d appreciate it.. this has been a bad year and I could use someone to talk too..
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